Okay, so I've found a new hobby - beading. Not applique beading; I've done that before and found it somewhat wanting. No, I'm talking about making things entirely out of beads - like jewelry and stuff. This weekend Jerry and I each made a little 2"x3" tapestry of a dragon. It's so cute! It took a really long time - about 8 hrs from start to finish. Quite a long time for something so small, but it was so much fun! I'm trying to start on a new, larger tapestry, but I'm having trouble getting the pattern just right. It's going to be an iridescent grey-scale dragon on a black & white background. I'm thinking of doing it about 7"x11". Jimmy is writing a research paper on dragons, and I think I'll loan it to him for that. But I want it back, lol!
It was Adriana at the Green Dragon that got us hooked on it. The Green Dragon is a hobby store about 5 minutes from our house. They have all our addictions - DnD, some 40K, books/comics, and now, beads. They also have some pagan stuff, too. Plus, the folks who own the place are awesome. Very friendly, helpful, and generous w/ discounts when you need them. I found a set of amethyst runes that were absolutely calling to me, and they lowered the price enough for me to buy them. I've studied, but one of my main books disappeared. Grr.
Other than that, my weekend was pretty uneventful. Read some. Played w/ the animals. Made lasagna last night cuz I could. More cheese than I intended, but still quite good. Still can't wait to go home!!!!
Monday, March 31, 2008
Friday, March 28, 2008
Grr and Phooey on Liars
Apparently, my instructor finds the truth to be disrespectful. I explained to her, in class, why everyone was so upset, and that was "disrespectful." Never mind that at least 4 other people I have talked to didn't find it to be in the least disrespectful, and they all agreed it was completely true. Apparently I "disrespected her." I think if someone doesn't want their students to tell them the truth, they shouldn't be teaching college. I don't know anyone, let alone a grown adult, that doesn't mind being lied to. Most of the people I know are the kind that will call you on it in a nanosecond. What is she thinking?
I spoke with the dean about her. Apparently, her other class isn't having the same problems we are. They all love her. We talked for about 20 minutes about why I was upset, and I stated specificallythat it's not just me. She has lost the trust of the whole class, and that's the point. It's not about the difficulty of the test or the grades we got on it. It's about trust. We can't trust her anymore, and that's like a slap in the face for most of us who were raised to expect honesty from our teachers. David Sessoms suggested I speak with her privately, apologize if it felt like we were attacking her, and explain calmly (like I did to him) what the problem was.
I tried to do that yesterday, but she wasn't in class. I guess I'll try again on Monday. *sigh*
On a lighter note, Jerry and I have a fun plan this weekend.
After tidying up the house a bit (so we don't embarrass ourselves), we're going to go around and take pictures of our house and the places we go a lot. That way, we can show how we're doing to all the family when we get home next month. It's silly, but I think it will be fun. Other than that, I expect it to be a slow weekend. I have almost all my final project finished, and I don't have any tests next week. I think it's going to actually be relaxing for a change. Also, it helps that I get off early today. A little too early in my opinion, but that's okay.
Hope everyone has a great weekend!
I spoke with the dean about her. Apparently, her other class isn't having the same problems we are. They all love her. We talked for about 20 minutes about why I was upset, and I stated specificallythat it's not just me. She has lost the trust of the whole class, and that's the point. It's not about the difficulty of the test or the grades we got on it. It's about trust. We can't trust her anymore, and that's like a slap in the face for most of us who were raised to expect honesty from our teachers. David Sessoms suggested I speak with her privately, apologize if it felt like we were attacking her, and explain calmly (like I did to him) what the problem was.
I tried to do that yesterday, but she wasn't in class. I guess I'll try again on Monday. *sigh*
On a lighter note, Jerry and I have a fun plan this weekend.
After tidying up the house a bit (so we don't embarrass ourselves), we're going to go around and take pictures of our house and the places we go a lot. That way, we can show how we're doing to all the family when we get home next month. It's silly, but I think it will be fun. Other than that, I expect it to be a slow weekend. I have almost all my final project finished, and I don't have any tests next week. I think it's going to actually be relaxing for a change. Also, it helps that I get off early today. A little too early in my opinion, but that's okay.
Hope everyone has a great weekend!
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Old Mindsets Coming Back to Haunt Me
Is it bad that I expect those in authority above me to not care about those under them?
For example, I have a new instructor at school. She came in halfway through the quarter to replace my original teacher who had to leave. I'm beginning to wonder if she has actual mental problems - either she lies to the class on a daily basis, or she honestly can't remember what she says from day to day. She will mention an assignment, not tell us the due date, then insist in the next class she said it was due that day. Or she will give a due date, then insist she didn't when we try to turn in the assignment. The final straw, though, was the test we took yesterday. She stated, specifically and repeatedly, that the test would be questions pulled from a study guide we created in class, with a few questions from chapter 9 that she added in at the last minute, and one of four essay questions she gave us in advance. She ended last class saying there would be no surprises on the test. The exam she handed us had no questions from the study guide, a different essay question, and ridiculous questions like the title and author of the text book. Granted, most of them were things we should know, but it wasn't what she swore up and down the exam would be. Then she insisted that nothing in the exam should have been a surprise, and if we had been in class we should have know it all. I have been in class. I have perfect attendance and I've never been late. I ended up walking out of the class early because I felt so disrespected by her attitude that if I'd stayed a minute longer I was going to start screaming at her.
Now, my inclination to handle this situation is to not go back to class. Turn in the final project, and never darken the door again. My friends and Jerry say I need to talk to the dean of the school, but I feel that since he hired her he wouldn't have a problem with her behavior. Otherwise, why would he have hired her? I expect that, if I walk into his office and tell him all this, he'll say "Life isn't fair. This is college. Grow up." Despite my preconceptions, I am going to speak with him at Jerry's insistance.
It's not that our dean is mean - he's actually a really nice guy. This behavior is what I expect from all people in a position of authority. I expect that authority to be abused and there to be nothing I can do about it. That's probably why I feel like people are attacking me so much. I always feel completely powerless in a situation with me vs an authority figure. My dad was in the military, and he has the same attitude, so it's just been reinforced my whole life. I don't know what to do about it, though. The thought of trying to challenge authority and being totally shut down terrifies me. I don't have the money to go back on depression medication, so I just want to ignore the situations that might put me back in the mindset that caused the depression in the first place. It's bad enough when I feel that I'm worthless most of the time - having it reinforced at every opportunity is a little more than I can take.
Anyway, I know this attitude probably isn't healthy, but I still don't know what to do about it. Just trying to face down my fear might or might not work. Either it will help, or it will make everything worse. With no middle ground, I prefer to ere on the side of caution and stay silent. Since that option is being denied to me by Jerry, I guess we'll just have to see what happens.
For example, I have a new instructor at school. She came in halfway through the quarter to replace my original teacher who had to leave. I'm beginning to wonder if she has actual mental problems - either she lies to the class on a daily basis, or she honestly can't remember what she says from day to day. She will mention an assignment, not tell us the due date, then insist in the next class she said it was due that day. Or she will give a due date, then insist she didn't when we try to turn in the assignment. The final straw, though, was the test we took yesterday. She stated, specifically and repeatedly, that the test would be questions pulled from a study guide we created in class, with a few questions from chapter 9 that she added in at the last minute, and one of four essay questions she gave us in advance. She ended last class saying there would be no surprises on the test. The exam she handed us had no questions from the study guide, a different essay question, and ridiculous questions like the title and author of the text book. Granted, most of them were things we should know, but it wasn't what she swore up and down the exam would be. Then she insisted that nothing in the exam should have been a surprise, and if we had been in class we should have know it all. I have been in class. I have perfect attendance and I've never been late. I ended up walking out of the class early because I felt so disrespected by her attitude that if I'd stayed a minute longer I was going to start screaming at her.
Now, my inclination to handle this situation is to not go back to class. Turn in the final project, and never darken the door again. My friends and Jerry say I need to talk to the dean of the school, but I feel that since he hired her he wouldn't have a problem with her behavior. Otherwise, why would he have hired her? I expect that, if I walk into his office and tell him all this, he'll say "Life isn't fair. This is college. Grow up." Despite my preconceptions, I am going to speak with him at Jerry's insistance.
It's not that our dean is mean - he's actually a really nice guy. This behavior is what I expect from all people in a position of authority. I expect that authority to be abused and there to be nothing I can do about it. That's probably why I feel like people are attacking me so much. I always feel completely powerless in a situation with me vs an authority figure. My dad was in the military, and he has the same attitude, so it's just been reinforced my whole life. I don't know what to do about it, though. The thought of trying to challenge authority and being totally shut down terrifies me. I don't have the money to go back on depression medication, so I just want to ignore the situations that might put me back in the mindset that caused the depression in the first place. It's bad enough when I feel that I'm worthless most of the time - having it reinforced at every opportunity is a little more than I can take.
Anyway, I know this attitude probably isn't healthy, but I still don't know what to do about it. Just trying to face down my fear might or might not work. Either it will help, or it will make everything worse. With no middle ground, I prefer to ere on the side of caution and stay silent. Since that option is being denied to me by Jerry, I guess we'll just have to see what happens.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
The Good, The Bad, and The Sleepy
Okay, so every day isn't happening at all. That's okay, right? It's my blog, and I say it's okay. :P
Pam bought Jerry and me plane tickets home for his birthday! We're going to be on Texas soil next month!!!! We're coming hooooooooome!
Can you tell I'm excited?
Life has not been all hunk-dory, but it hasn't been that bad.
We had the meeting the other day for Sales Person on the Month. There are different sections of the classifieds - I'm in Inside Sales. Anyway, my boss screwed up, and it potentially cost me Inside Sales Person on the Month. There were two winners, one of which is the person who started the same day I did. They both got 27 points. According to Deseret's calculations, I had 26 points. Unfortunately, she undercounted my total calls answered last month (which is where some of the points come from) by over 200 calls. In other words, I had 27 same as them. Since there couldn't be 3 winners, she is giving me an extra point towards next month.
On the up side, she did something I find very odd, but it's beneficial to me.
Our commission isn't based on actual dollar volume of sales. Every month we have goals of how much we are supposed to sell that month. This goal is called our budget. Our commisions are based on the percent of budget we achieve. Deseret set me a very low budget this month - only $10,000. I've already sold over $24,000 this month. So, in my commision check, it will seem like I sold over 250% of budget. That will mean a very fat commission check - yay! I'm wondering if she's doing it to make up for the fact that the actual award winners received a bonus. I'm not complaining, mind you. If anything, this is why I love my boss. She takes care of her own.
I would probably be alot more enthused if I weren't so tired. I've been hard pressed to fall asleep before midnight the past few nights. I just can't sleep. I wish I could figure out what's causing it so I can stop it. Oh, well. Jerry flipped the mattress around, so the bed is a lot more comfy. Maybe that will do the trick.
That's it for now. Ciao.
Pam bought Jerry and me plane tickets home for his birthday! We're going to be on Texas soil next month!!!! We're coming hooooooooome!
Can you tell I'm excited?
Life has not been all hunk-dory, but it hasn't been that bad.
We had the meeting the other day for Sales Person on the Month. There are different sections of the classifieds - I'm in Inside Sales. Anyway, my boss screwed up, and it potentially cost me Inside Sales Person on the Month. There were two winners, one of which is the person who started the same day I did. They both got 27 points. According to Deseret's calculations, I had 26 points. Unfortunately, she undercounted my total calls answered last month (which is where some of the points come from) by over 200 calls. In other words, I had 27 same as them. Since there couldn't be 3 winners, she is giving me an extra point towards next month.
On the up side, she did something I find very odd, but it's beneficial to me.
Our commission isn't based on actual dollar volume of sales. Every month we have goals of how much we are supposed to sell that month. This goal is called our budget. Our commisions are based on the percent of budget we achieve. Deseret set me a very low budget this month - only $10,000. I've already sold over $24,000 this month. So, in my commision check, it will seem like I sold over 250% of budget. That will mean a very fat commission check - yay! I'm wondering if she's doing it to make up for the fact that the actual award winners received a bonus. I'm not complaining, mind you. If anything, this is why I love my boss. She takes care of her own.
I would probably be alot more enthused if I weren't so tired. I've been hard pressed to fall asleep before midnight the past few nights. I just can't sleep. I wish I could figure out what's causing it so I can stop it. Oh, well. Jerry flipped the mattress around, so the bed is a lot more comfy. Maybe that will do the trick.
That's it for now. Ciao.
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
......Just Breathe....
Ack! Test! Test! Mayday! Mayday!
Extensor Digitorum Longus does not compute!
Pectinius user error!
Peroneus Brevis = invalid data!
Have I mentioned I hate the human muscular system? 'Cuz I do. A lot.
Those of you who do not understand this post, be grateful. I wish I didn't understand it, either, but I have a test over it, and much more, 3 hrs. I think it's time to start praying.
Extensor Digitorum Longus does not compute!
Pectinius user error!
Peroneus Brevis = invalid data!
Have I mentioned I hate the human muscular system? 'Cuz I do. A lot.
Those of you who do not understand this post, be grateful. I wish I didn't understand it, either, but I have a test over it, and much more, 3 hrs. I think it's time to start praying.
Monday, March 17, 2008
Birthday Presents and Too Many Tests
Well, posting this weekend never happened. Then again, I have dial-up internet, so I'm not really suprised.
Great news on the birthday front! Bit of a story behind it, though. When Jerry took his laptop to Circuit City last week to have a diagnostic run on it, I noticed there was a special going on - any purchases made on a Circuit City card over $250 had no interest until 2010. So I head back there Friday to apply because I know he would love a camera. A real camera, not a cheap pocket digital one.
He's wanted a real camera since he was 16, but his parents don't seem to understand there's a difference between a real camera and a pocket digital. They gave him their old pocket digital, but he never uses it because he hates pocket digital cameras. And, of course, since they already gave him a camera, they have no interest in giving him another. Yet another example of how his parents don't understand what's important to him, and don't really care one way or another.
Anyway, there was a phenomenal camera on sale that was above the $250 no interest mark, but still low enough I can get it paid off before the interest kickes in, so I apply for the card, but I get rejected. I don't have bad credit, but I just don't have a whole lot of credit. Jerry, on the other hand, has been building his credit for over 5 years. I headed home, but I was bummed because I couldn't get him the camera, I ended up telling him the whole thing. He applies for the card, gets it, and we end up buying him the camera anyway as an early birthdays present. This means he won't have anything to open in the 13th, but he doesn't really care about stuff like that.
He's been playing with the camera all weekend, checking out various shutter speeds, etc. I've taken a few shots with it, too, but I don't know that much about cameras. It's a little advanced for me. Maybe I'll get him to teach me once he has it figured out. I got a new Zen, a V Plus, so I've been playing with that, too.
We spent most on Sunday walking around dowtown Charleston snapping pictures. The day was warm and bright - an absolutely beautiful day to be outside. We had a ball! Got a little sunburned, but nothing too bad.
All weekend, and most of today, I've been trying to study for two tests I have. One is today, and one is tomorrow. The one tomorrow is nothing but rote memorization, and I just can't seem to get the terms to stick in my head. I'm getting really worried. I need a good grade on this test to maintain my B in the class. I suppose I better get back to trying to study.
Great news on the birthday front! Bit of a story behind it, though. When Jerry took his laptop to Circuit City last week to have a diagnostic run on it, I noticed there was a special going on - any purchases made on a Circuit City card over $250 had no interest until 2010. So I head back there Friday to apply because I know he would love a camera. A real camera, not a cheap pocket digital one.
He's wanted a real camera since he was 16, but his parents don't seem to understand there's a difference between a real camera and a pocket digital. They gave him their old pocket digital, but he never uses it because he hates pocket digital cameras. And, of course, since they already gave him a camera, they have no interest in giving him another. Yet another example of how his parents don't understand what's important to him, and don't really care one way or another.
Anyway, there was a phenomenal camera on sale that was above the $250 no interest mark, but still low enough I can get it paid off before the interest kickes in, so I apply for the card, but I get rejected. I don't have bad credit, but I just don't have a whole lot of credit. Jerry, on the other hand, has been building his credit for over 5 years. I headed home, but I was bummed because I couldn't get him the camera, I ended up telling him the whole thing. He applies for the card, gets it, and we end up buying him the camera anyway as an early birthdays present. This means he won't have anything to open in the 13th, but he doesn't really care about stuff like that.
He's been playing with the camera all weekend, checking out various shutter speeds, etc. I've taken a few shots with it, too, but I don't know that much about cameras. It's a little advanced for me. Maybe I'll get him to teach me once he has it figured out. I got a new Zen, a V Plus, so I've been playing with that, too.
We spent most on Sunday walking around dowtown Charleston snapping pictures. The day was warm and bright - an absolutely beautiful day to be outside. We had a ball! Got a little sunburned, but nothing too bad.
All weekend, and most of today, I've been trying to study for two tests I have. One is today, and one is tomorrow. The one tomorrow is nothing but rote memorization, and I just can't seem to get the terms to stick in my head. I'm getting really worried. I need a good grade on this test to maintain my B in the class. I suppose I better get back to trying to study.
Friday, March 14, 2008
Um... yeah.... I'm here.....
Okay, so I've seen a few blog sites come and go in the past. I've never been one of those religious bloggers whose day is not complete without an hour of posting, but I'm getting a little tired of all the people I never talk to for months on end suddenly asking, "How are you? What's going on in your life?"
This way, I can just say, "See my blog, " and it answers everything. Of course, this complaint shows how hypocritical I actually am, because I do the same thing to my friends. Love you, Shelli! Love you, Mary! Sorry I suck at keeping in touch!!
Plus, I don't know, maybe it will make my life feel less monotonous. All the days are starting to look really similiar to me. That's probably not good.
So, those are my hopes for this blog. What my hopes will come to, only time can tell. Now, on to the real blog:
What's constantly coming back to my mind is Jerry's birthday. He turns 22 next month, and I have no idea what to get him. I see all these things he'd love... and then I see the price tag... and think about that fact that he'd most likely stop using the thing after a month... and I have no idea what to get him again. It's not that he fickle about presents, it's just that his tastes change so rapidly. He'll still value it, but if he's not actually using it, I don't see the point. I want to get him something that will stand the test of time... or at least until the next birthday.
And, of course, there's the whole money thing. Or lack thereof. Our spend got so out-of-control during Christmas, I'm terrified of being in that situation again. We're finally at a good place right now. We're paying back most of the loan we had to take our from Pam and David, our bills are getting paid, and we both have decent jobs. It's time for me to get of work, now. More later, maybe.
This way, I can just say, "See my blog, " and it answers everything. Of course, this complaint shows how hypocritical I actually am, because I do the same thing to my friends. Love you, Shelli! Love you, Mary! Sorry I suck at keeping in touch!!
Plus, I don't know, maybe it will make my life feel less monotonous. All the days are starting to look really similiar to me. That's probably not good.
So, those are my hopes for this blog. What my hopes will come to, only time can tell. Now, on to the real blog:
What's constantly coming back to my mind is Jerry's birthday. He turns 22 next month, and I have no idea what to get him. I see all these things he'd love... and then I see the price tag... and think about that fact that he'd most likely stop using the thing after a month... and I have no idea what to get him again. It's not that he fickle about presents, it's just that his tastes change so rapidly. He'll still value it, but if he's not actually using it, I don't see the point. I want to get him something that will stand the test of time... or at least until the next birthday.
And, of course, there's the whole money thing. Or lack thereof. Our spend got so out-of-control during Christmas, I'm terrified of being in that situation again. We're finally at a good place right now. We're paying back most of the loan we had to take our from Pam and David, our bills are getting paid, and we both have decent jobs. It's time for me to get of work, now. More later, maybe.
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